Author Archives: Dr. Chris

About Dr. Chris

A board certified anesthesiologist who has butted heads with surgeons across the nation, Dr. Chris is a blunt straight-talker. He won't hold back, can't be intimidated, and doesn't care who might be offended. Now retired from clinical practice, he makes his living as a medical writer at MinaMedCom . You can find his movie reviews at Hate All The Movies , and for the main portal to all things Dr. Chris, check out Dr. Chris TV.

Justice League Proves Wonder Woman was a Fluke

After last summer’s excellent Wonder Woman, many fans were hopeful that Warner Brothers had finally turned a corner with their DC film universe. Unfortunately, Justice League proved that Wonder Woman was nothing but a happy anomaly in an otherwise endless sea of wretched films. Zach Snyder directed most of it, and infused the film with his signature bleakness. Joss Whedon was called in to finish directing when Snyder left the project because of a family tragedy. Whedon’s ham-fistedly grafted-on one-liners and attempts at levity are painfully obvious.

Justice League was an expensive movie, but it looked cheap. The big bad Steppenwolf (voiced by Ciarán Hinds) was a CGI mess that might have been passable in a video game 5-10 years ago. League member Cyborg (Ray Fisher) was a constantly morphing, humanoid-shaped blob with garish red bits. He’d have looked better if the studio had simply copied the effects from 16-year-old Terminator 2. The endless waves of minions, the weapons, the explosions, the fire effects, the water, pretty much everything looked obviously and horribly fake. You couldn’t get away with releasing a top-tier video game that looked this bad. Continue reading →

Kenneth Branagh Delivers a Tepid Remake of Murder on the Orient Express

Another week, another remake. Kenneth Branagh both directs and stars in the latest adaptation of Agatha Christie’s Murder on the Orient Express. Based on the novel published in 1934, this film, like many works in the mystery genre, relies on a series of wild logical leaps, critical information pulled out of nowhere when the plot requires it, evidence that would never stand up in court, and the tendency of suspects to blurt out confessions at the drop of a hat. The story has been kicking around for over 80 years and has been subjected to numerous adaptations, so no one is likely to be surprised by the outcome. The question for a film like this is: Do the actors and director tell the familiar story in an entertaining way?

The ingredients are certainly there. In addition to Branagh as the famous detective Hercule Poirot, the film features a talent-rich ensemble cast including Penelope Cruz, Derek Jacobi, Michelle Pfeiffer, Judi Dench, and Willem Dafoe. Unfortunately, Branagh, wearing his director’s hat, largely wastes them. Continue reading →

Chris Hemsworth and Tessa Thompson in Thor: Ragnarok

Thor: Ragnarok Strikes Comedy Gold

Whether intentional or not, Thor: Ragnarok is a delightfully funny spoof of the superhero genre. Director Taika Waititi may or may not have been simply trying to lighten things up a bit, but what he delivered looked like the product of Adam West’s Batman and Don Adam’s Get Smart having a fling with Monty Python (including a brief “I’m not dead yet” gag). And I mean this in a good way.

The silly tone is set immediately with the opening sequence, and there’s a huge supporting cast of weird characters to keep the laughs going. Valkyrie (Tessa Thompson) is the last surviving Valkyrie bent on consuming as much alcohol as she possibly can (and it’s a LOT). She reluctantly helps Thor (Chris Hemsworth) try to reclaim Asgard from his big sister Hela (Cate Blanchett). Continue reading →

Ryan Gosling and Sylvia Hoeks walk past displays of replicants in Blade Runner 2049

Blade Runner 2049: Nary a Navel Left Ungazed

Thirty-five years after the iconic Blade Runner hit theaters, director Denis Villeneuve brings his vision of the dystopian future to life in Blade Runner 2049. Fortunately, Blade Runner 2049 is a clear sequel, so we are spared another tiresome reboot/remake. Unfortunately, like most sequels, it’s far inferior to the original.

Blade Runner was a masterfully made noir that raised existential questions about what it means to be human. Blade Runner 2049 is the tedious, self-indulgent film you’d expect to get if a bunch of self-absorbed college theater majors were suddenly handed a huge budget. It tries way too hard to be profound, and takes way too long to do it. Continue reading →

Jackie Chan Takes a Crack at Dramatic Acting in The Foreigner

Jackie Chan is well known for comedy martial arts movies and ridiculous, over the top action sequences. In The Foreigner, he tries to put all that behind him and get serious. It doesn’t turn out well.

Jackie Chan and Katie Leung in The ForeignerQuan Ngoc Minh (Chan) is a dangerously hypercompetent ex-military guy who is lovingly devoted to his daughter Fan (Katie Leung). Unfortunately for Quan, Fan is not taken or kidnapped at the start of the film, she’s blown up. Convinced that high-ranking Irish minister Liam Hennessy (Pierce Brosnan) knows who the bombers are, Quan relentlessly hounds Hennessy with steadily escalating violence and destruction to get him to give up the names. Continue reading →