The Grumpy Old Guys on Star Wars: The Force Awakens

This week, Dr. Chris and the rest of the Grumpy Guys argue about Star Wars. Spoiler Alert – Dr. Chris was not a fan. Well, not really much of a spoiler if you read the review immediately below this post.  But maybe some of the other guys liked it. Listen to the episode or download it and see for yourself.


To download, right click and “save as” here.

Or copy/paste this RSS feed address.

Star Wars: The Force Awakens is a Lackluster Remake

I thought Star Wars was a fantastic movie. The first time I saw it. Almost 40 years ago. But this unimaginative, formulaic remake doesn’t really cut it. The first sign of trouble was the opening text crawl. The Empire is now the First Order and the Rebel Alliance is now the Resistance. Wait! What the hell? I know it’s supposed to be a 30 year time jump, but at the end of Return of the Jedi, the Rebels had destroyed the second Death Star, the Emperor was dead, and the teddy bears were using stormtrooper helmets as drum kits. Now a renamed Empire is back in control? So apparently everything that happened in the original trilogy was a big waste of time because now we’re back to square one. We’ve even got Supreme Leader Snookie, err Snoke, seamlessly replacing Emperor Palpatine.

Yes, I know there is a big mass of Star Wars cannon attempting to explain all this away, but here’s the thing – I’m not going to buy novels and comic books and study supplemental material just to understand what’s going on. Providing all that information for the nerds to enjoy, and pay for, is fine, but a movie needs to stand on its own. If a movie can’t stand on its own, then that’s just bad writing. Continue reading

The Warcraft Movie Trailer: Sympathetic Orcs, Racist Bastard Humans, and Green Moses

The Warcraft trailer has been released, and it bodes poorly for the movie. See it for yourself below.

Who is the audience for this thing? Is this a general release movie or the most expensive piece of fan fiction ever created? Unless you are a Warcraft lore junkie or have been playing Blizzard games for the past two decades, you will not have the foggiest clue who any of the characters are. You’re expected to get excited about a bunch of humans and generic CGI orcs in a generic CGI fantasy setting.

Which is another big problem. There’s WAY too much CGI in this thing. And the juxtaposition of human actors and CGI orcs simply looks bizarre. You can get away with combining actors and animation in movies like Who Framed Roger Rabbit, but it only works if the animation is clearly animation. Warcraft immediately charges headlong into the Uncanny Valley and gleefully builds a homestead. Continue reading